To the lost, the lonely, the indecisive,

...and the broken hearts in between:

I've recently lost. Perhaps I lost a battle that was not meant to be fought or perhaps I lost something that was not mine to begin with. There is no real description... All I know is that I lost.

And right now, I'm not sure if I'm closed off or if I've opened up. There really are two sides to everything and you can never really know for certain what some things seem to be.

Certain gravitational forces tend to pull you where you're supposed to be and there are ways to fight it, but why fight nature? Why fight the inevitable? Your efforts would just be lost... Just as I am.

As I contemplate on the situation at hand, I have been blessed with a few insights that seem to add to my increasing need to figure out what it all means. One of the insights actually came from me. It's funny how you can surprise yourself with the things that you already know, but are just only coming to fully realize at the moment that you are voicing them out.

I was speaking to a friend yesterday, who said that she was mildly upset and possibly envious because I get to spend more time with the person that she longs to be beside... I told her that there is no need to be envious, because at the end of the day, even if you are almost intertwined with someone, it doesn't mean that you are not far apart. Being in close proximity to someone does not mean that you are close.

And that is somehow relatable to being in a relationship and yet somehow feeling absolutely alone. I'd never want to be in that situation... I'd hate to be with someone and yet feel like I have no one. I might as well break it off, at least if I were lonely then, my excuse would be that I'm single.

This morning, a friend sent me a message. I feel it may have been God who was sending me the message through that friend. The message said that ultimately it's not about finding the right person, but being the right person.

And so to the lost, the lonely, the indecisive, and the broken hearts in between, I wish for you as I wish for myself, that we finally find the best version of ourselves to show not only to the ones that we love, but to everyone else.


As Always,
D.